Facebook is driving internet marketers bonkers.

First it was the rumors that Facebook was trying to buy Twitter; then it was all the bruhaha about Mark Zuckerberg’s “secret” Twitter account. (Personally, I think that if he meant for it to be a secret, his avatar wouldn’t have been a PHOTO of himself - LOL.)

And now this.

Personally, I think that internet marketers, voracious little creatures that they (ok, ok, we) are, biting into every social network like it was a tasty Napoleon cake. C’mon now, Facebook is for FRIENDS. And for all the good feeling that I have for my hundreds of Twitter followers or my LinkedIn contacts, the fact is that they’re not really my buddies. I don’t talk to them about women or religion, I won’t call them in the middle of the night asking for a favor (and don’t expect them to!), and I won’t let them see me in my underwear or grab stuff from my fridge. They’re contacts. Business acquaintances. Which is nice, it’s well and good and as it should be. Nothing wrong with that, like that Seinfeld episode kept saying. Just, not my buddies.

So, who’s on my Facebook? My childhood friends, my siblings, my Dad (finally got him on it, after much cajoling - “C’mon Dad, I’m not gonna send you pics of the kids, they’re all on my Facebook. Get an account already.”) Some friends I’ve made over the years, at work, volunteering or on other social occasions. That’s my Facebook.

And yet, there was good ol’ Ed Dale back in 2008 preaching the “get as many friends on your Facebook as you can” approach. (I love ya Ed, you’re usually spot-on. But I went another way on this one.)

Now, Caroline Middlebrook had it right in her post about Facebook multiple accounts and how that’s a bad idea. And what was Caroline preaching back then? Facebook pages.

Boy, was she right.

Now, what happened to all those that got thousands of Facebook openquote-friends-closequote? They lost all value of their Facebook accounts as they got mired down in the myriad minutiae of many minions (alliterated aplenty, right there!) whose shenanigans were not relevant to our protagonists’ lives. And why not? Because they were not noquote-friends-noquote. That’s why. (Which is why Ed started saying this.)

So, recently Ed Dale went on a quotefriend purge and sacked the whole bunch.

Soon, Jesse Newhart also took the axe to his quotefriends. But, much to his chagrin, Facebook went aTwitter on us. What is that about, says Jesse.

The fact is, Twitter has a lot going for it. And Mark is not dumb, and neither are his cohorts over at Facebookville. So, of course they would look at Twitter’s growth chart and start stealing replicating, emulating it. Plus, Facebook is experiencing unprecedented expansion these days. EVERYONE is getting on it now. So it’s only natural that Mark&Co would look for ways to improve it, catering to the influx of new users.

Bottomline:

1. Silly marketer, Facebook is for friends!
2. Facebook pages = good
3. Facebook will be more like Twitter. Twitter will grow on. Life is good.
4. Get over it.

And the two will live happily ever after.
As evidenced by Facebook groups preaching the Twitter gospel and Facebook tutorials on how to best integrate Twitter.

Don’t know how?
Well, I’ll tell ya.
Nah, too lazy.

I’ll let AJ Vaynerchuck do it for me, since his tutorial rocks.
(But do keep in mind that AJ is biased.)